Check out her latest book on Amazon
Hello, my name is Sophie Tanner. I wrote my first novel, Reader, I Married Me, after going through a bad break up – being cheated on, lied to and rejected by the person I trusted the most. But, you know what, looking back I realize it was one of the best things that ever happened to me.
Romantic love is wonderful and all, but realising that I actually didn’t need ‘another half’ to ‘complete me’ was an awesome revelation to have. I think our society can be a teensy bit obsessed with romance – there are so many books, films and songs about it, you can’t help feeling like you have to fall in love in order to be truly happy.
I began to appreciate everything I already had and realised that I loved my life – my friends, my family, my home and, most importantly, myself. I decided to stop chasing ‘happily ever after’ and start living ‘happily ever now’. I was so taken with this idea that I actually had a public cultural ceremony in Brighton in 2015 and married myself, taking vows of self commitment in front of my family and friends.
Yes, I know it sounds bonkers but the idea was to start conversations and ask the question ‘why shouldn’t self love be AS important as romantic love?!’ After all, your relationship with yourself deserves as much attention as any other – and the more you deal with your own crap the less other people have to, right?
So, my new novel is loosely based on my own experience of sologamy (marrying yourself) because it turns out that loving yourself so publicly is not easy – in fact, it was quite a controversial move and I came up against a lot of trolls! Which kind of highlights the complex attitude our culture has to self-love in the first place.
However, in answering questions that I’d never considered and in fighting my corner I have become even more of an ambassador for self love. I feel so lucky to have been on this amazing journey of self-discovery and my main goal is to inspire other people to recognize their true value and to be happy within themselves.