Traits of a Great Parent
Anything that is worth having is worth the effort to keep. That includes an open and honest relationship with your children. I always keep the lines of communication open with my them. When I make myself available to discuss things, I encourage them to be open and honest, as I always am with them. It is important and priority to me that my children feel comfortable to speak with me about anything. There is never any judgment.
Our home is our escape from troubles. It’s an environment free of toxic drama, excessive noise, and resentful feelings. My children respect each other, even when they have trouble seeing eye to eye. I have taught them how to handle conflict without violence or raising their voices, and without judgment on the views of the other. Our stress levels remain low, even in disagreements! Peace lives within our home.
As I was growing up, I had my rebellious periods, as I am sure most do. However, when my mother tried to offer criticisms on my personal choices, I tried to avoid feeling offended or hurt. I always tried to remember that she had my best interest at heart. My mother was very precious to me, so I always felt she deserved respect.
Parenting is one job that requires your utmost effort and attention. Great children most often have great parents. Being a great parent isn’t easy, but it’s easier if you try to cultivate certain attributes to help you through. You can develop these attributes with practice and determination. Be the best parent you can be and enjoy the journey.
Ask yourself these questions:
- In what ways do I offer support to my children?
- How do I allocate time for my children?
- What are some of the activities that I enjoy doing with my children?
It’s not easy to be a great parent. Not everyone had the best examples to follow, and it’s not a skill taught in school. You either have to educate yourself or learn on the job.
While there are many parenting styles, successful parents share attributes that give their children the best chance for success and happiness. Most parents have a few of these attributes but must develop the others. I wanted to share some of the attributes I always try to use with my own children:
- Patience. You knew this would be at the top of the list. Children are messy, noisy, don’t listen well, and exasperating. They can also be pretty wonderful, too. But patience is essential. Learning to take a deep breath and relax can help more than just your parenting skills.
- Multi-tasking skills. Dealing with work, your home responsibilities, and children require a great ability to multitask. Children constantly pull your attention away from whatever you’re doing. It’s not easy to regain your focus. One way I dealt with this was work stayed at the front door when I entered my home at the end of the day. Just as personal stayed at the door when I worked. Not always easy, but the effort gave me some peace of mind.
- Encouraging. Children quickly learn to doubt themselves and worry about the opinions of others. One of the best ways to combat this is to encourage your children. With enough encouragement, a child can become their best self. Children who can see themselves as having positive self-worth describe themselves in positive terms.
- Supportive. Encouragement and support go hand-in-hand. Children with support grow up to be relaxed and comfortable. Without support, the world can be a very scary place. Teach your child there’s little to fear. When you continue to provide love, support, trust and optimism with them on a consistent basis, you make them feel safe and secure, and these are powerful weapons against peer pressure, life’s challenges, and disappointments.
- Problem Solving. Children provide a unique set of challenges that have to be solved. A little brain power can help you to navigate the minefield that parenting can entail.
- Define the problem. What are the signs there’s a problem at all?
- Find various options for solutions. What are some good ideas to solve this?
- Then, evaluate your options and choose from among them. What is the best option to solve the problem? What’s the easiest option? How should you prioritize?
- Finally, implement the chosen solution. Does it solve the problem? Is there another option you need to try?
Takeaway: before you can solve a problem, seek to understand it fully.
- Flexibility. Many of your parenting attempts will fail. You must be flexible enough to have multiple solutions up your sleeve. When one doesn’t work, you can always try something else. Plans are always changing, too. It helps if you can go with the flow.
- Good leadership skills. You might be able to boss your kids around, but they’ll resent it, and they never forget. It’s more effective to have good leadership skills and only throw your parental weight around when necessary.
- Dependability. Kids feel safe when they have reliable and dependable parents. They have to know that you’re there for them. How much can your kids trust your word? How reliable do your friends consider you to be?
- Compassion. Children need to develop and experience compassion. Your children need understanding and comforting, they need compassion when called for. Can you provide those two things?
- Sense of humor. Your children will give you plenty of opportunities to laugh. It would be a shame to allow those moments to go to waste. You’ll keep your sanity if you have a great sense of humor.
- Self-awareness. Children aren’t sure how to act. It’s up to you to be a role model. You’ll find that kids react to situations in ways that mimic your reactions. They don’t know any other way. It’s important to be self-aware enough to know whether you’re being a good role model.
The responsibilities of life are sometimes consuming, but I prevent them from taking over. Finding balance involves making time for my children, and providing them with a successful journey.
Today, love guides my ability to maintain good relationships with my children as grown adults. Their well-being is still my priority. The effort to maintain our bond is worth the lifetime of love that we share. It All Starts With You!
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